How To Deal With 'Not Getting It All Done'
As women, we tend to try and do it all. Work, potentially running a business on the side, raising babies of any form, having a family, squeezing in time for friends, trying not to complain about all of the weekend events we "must" go to, maybe fitting in a quick 5 min shower, getting the household chores done, and then somehow managing to talk ourselves down from having a mental breakdown from complete overwhelm! It's absolutely exhausting and impossible.
The truth is, none of us have super powers... we have to sleep, rest, restore, otherwise we end up sick, or run around with total brain fog, from trying to juggle it all and not taking the time to be still. But how do we prevent guilt and not being pissed off at ourselves from not getting it all done even though our vision of accomplishment is so strong and exciting?
We just can't do it all, especially when some weeks have more obligations than others. So let's talk about some ways you can stop having such productivity shame and make things easier for yourself and your ambitious soul. Depending on your week and your goals, you can use any of these methods more or less according to your plans 😜
Say no to the energy zappers: The friend that talks for 2 hours on the phone with you about utter drama and bullshit, the family party you really don't want to attend, cooking, going to run errands... sometimes you just have to say fuck it! Especially if there are too many important tasks to accomplish. If you have to, forward a call, say no to an event and order take-out all week! It's your life, you can stop doing crap for everyone else all the time. Is it worth it to waste two hours of your time doing errands only to beat yourself up about what you could have been doing instead? Hell no... Hell no. Screw the errands and the family party, I'm writing a damn online course (lol)!
Let the unimportant shit go: Honestly, is anyone going to die if the dishes or the laundry does not get done? Nope. But for some reason we take on the burden (some of us alone, without help), and let it consume our lives. Prioritizing is something we will take about in a later step, but if you REALLY want to get something done, or perhaps taking a damn bath and potentially relax, screw the damn chores! Even if you do the chores tomorrow and use the one hour you have today to get something you want to do done... it's worth it to put the chores aside. Be a rebel!
Stop planning on achieving too many tasks: I have a hard time with this. It's like ordering too much food because you're hungry and then you're left feeling like a blimp in a coma. At the beginning of each week I am always so ambitious and somehow do not plan in realistic time for rest, household chores, cooking, showering, sleep, entertaining my pup, spending quality time with those who I want to be around and other obligations. So I end up shooting too high and planning to take on too many large goals and barely get anything 100% completed by the end of the week. Then you end up feeling unaccomplished, ashamed, overwhelmed, tired, and underpaid in all aspects (lol!), sound familiar? If you're a busy person, give yourself more time to get the tasks done or break them down into smaller achievable pieces.
Plan for the outcomes you want not the actual tasks: I was just watching a Tony Robbins segment on youtube about how a millionaire schedules his day, Tony suggested that we plan for the OUTCOMES we want not the actual tasks we want to accomplish because sometimes those tasks have nothing to do with our OUTCOMES. For example, a few of my outcomes this week was to be an excellent Feng Shui student (continuing education always makes me happy), create a website that really speaks to my clients (I am redoing all of my descriptions and graphics), and create content that serves my clients to the fullest (hopefully this helps you out!). But some of the tasks I had on my to-do list did not reflect my outcomes, therefor they are useless this week and only serve as a placeholder for overwhelm, bye bye useless tasks!
Why do you want to achieve those outcomes? The next step was to write down WHY you want to achieve those outcomes? The WHY will give you motivation, drive, and stamina to get the outcomes you desire. Go play Sia's "The Greatest" while you write down your 'whys', it'll give you some stamina and pep :)
Once you have the outcomes and why... Then you write down the steps you need to do in order to achieve your outcomes! Those steps should be what you want to work towards so you don't get completely overwhelmed with other bullshit tasks. If you're a ridiculously busy person, shoot for only 1-3 achievable tasks per week only to get those outcomes you want. Taking on too much will only leave you disappointed.
Prioritize: What is truly important to you today, this week, this quarter of the year, in your life in general? What is urgent? Make your to-do list reflect this and hopefully it serves you better than what you were doing before! Take a damn day off from your job if you have to, sleep in, call a babysitter, do whatever you have to do to get a few simple, but urgent, tasks done.
Remember the self-care: This one always gets to me too, but its true. If you don't take care of yourself, if you don't get enough sleep, if you don't get enough play time... you can't fully show up to any task or have high-energy to take on the world. It is pretty insane how we let ourselves fall down to the back of the priority list, but you have to do it. You don't want to end up sick and be forced to rest, so plan for some preventative medicine and take care of yourself.
There are Flower Essences that can help with organizing, motivation, self-care and heightened energy. Check out my suggestions below!
I really hope this has served you.
Sometimes I have to teach what I need to learn, so know that you are not alone. Life can be really overwhelming and hard at times, but we are working so hard because we know of the beauty, joy, and happiness that is in our daily lives and is waiting for us just around the river bend. Goals are there to help us achieve, gain insight, accomplish our greatest desires. They are not supposed to be there to crush our spirits and steal our precious sleep hours.
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All my love,
Bianca